"Raising Church Children "
Sermon by Dr. Kit Schooley
given July 2, 2006
SCRIPTURE - Mark 5:21-25, 34-43:
21When Jesus had crossed again in the boat to the other side, a great crowd gathered around him; and he was by the sea.
22 Then one of the leaders of the synagogue named Jairus came and, when he saw him, fell at his feet
23 and begged him repeatedly, "My little daughter is at the point of death. Come and lay your hands on her, so that she may be made well, and live."
24 Jesus went with him, the whole crowd tagging along, pushing and jostling him.
35 While he was still speaking, some people came from the leader's house to say, "Your daughter is dead. Why trouble the teacher any further?"
36 But overhearing what they said, Jesus said to the leader of the synagogue, "Do not fear, only believe."
37 He allowed no one to follow him except Peter, James, and John, the brother of James.
38 They entered the leader's house and pushed their way through the gossips looking for a story and neighbors bringing in casseroles.
39 Jesus was abrupt: "Why all this busybody grief and gossip? This child isn't dead; she's sleeping." Provoked to sarcasm, they told him he didn't know what he was talking about.
40 But when he had sent them all out, he took the child's father and mother, along with his companions, and entered the child's room.
41 He took her by the hand and said to her, "Talitha cum," which means, "Little girl, get up!"
42 And immediately the girl got up and began to walk about (she was twelve years of age). At this they were overcome with amazement.
43 He strictly ordered them that no one should know this, and told them to give her something to eat.
Jairus. An important man, probably. No, definitely. Powerful . . . persuasive . . .not comfortable in the large crowd trailing the Lord; but wearing a most important identity, he plunges into the crowd — this well-off, competent, and terrified father. His daughter, 12, is suffering from the terror of his time: illness with a coma. His daughter is at death's door.
Jairus is every desperate parent who ever lived. He finds, then implores Jesus: "Come, lay your hands on her. Restore her before it is too late." Jesus heads off to the well-off's home.
Then, suddenly, Mark's heads off for 9 verses into a second illness story — which we've left out today — about a 12-year disease in a grown-up, then hurries back to reopen the curtain on Jairus, this important man, left waiting on the side.
Alas, t'is now late. Too late. All the belief in Jesus as a healer, will not be able to turn the tide. Word comes, quickly, definitely: " . . . no reason to bring Jesus home with you." It is probably his wife's word: "No need. She's dead. Our child, the product of our love, gone. Faith cannot turn this."
We know differently. We know she is not dead; and know Jesus goes in, invites her to rise, talitha cum, come out from under that prayer shawl. She arises. Alive, able to be, to believe, in the one whom God sent. Able to resume childhood. She of an age to remind us of our confirmation children, children like Emily Bove (a new class beginning in the fall.)
Now, with death denied, the parents receive everyday life back.
What does this story means for a congregation like ours, with its children, its precious children?
It's Sunday morning, and at houses all over this congregation conversations sound like this:
- "My shirt is still in the dirty clothes hamper! I don't have anything to wear to church!"
- "It's so looong! Do I have to go, Mom? Can't I stay home?"
- "I don't get it Dad, you like worship?"
- "Are we going to stay for worship Mommy? Can I stand up and see the choir march in?"
- "When they hand out the little bread, can I have some little bread?"
- "For sure, I won't crawl under the bench when I drop the paper this week. I'll leave it for the dog under there."
- "Can we sit in the pew next to the blue window, Daddy? I like that window with the man holding the book."
All these have sounded in some home here.
Starting on September 10, we clergy and educators eagerly anticipate having lots of children in the worship services. This summer we are getting ready for that change. We hope you are getting ready too?
Jesus dropped everything to get to Jairus' house for a 12-year-old child. That's our cue for us to prepare for 12-year-olds, and 4-year-olds, as worshipers. They aren't more important than 44- or 84-year-olds. But they are just as important to God's worship.
Seriousness is where we start. One of the things adults depend on children to do is lighten the air, give us laughter and pleasure in a world we often find heavy, and without humor. Likewise, we depend on them to distract. I'm not sure it's entirely fair to count on children for this, but most children become used to the job, and by age 4 or 5, know it's important to be cute, and humorous and distracting. But, with the solemnity of our Sunday worship, most of us feel compelled to put lid on, figuring children won't fit, couldn't belong in the sanctuary for a 55-minute, even a 45-minute service. Too solemn, too sophisticated. It'll drive'em crazy, we think. And they'll drive us crazy, we think.
Going crazy brings a couple of questions about God's creation called children. Questions that need to hang out there in the mind for a while. No final answers today.
First one: Do children need to worship and praise God?
Next: Will having children with us for a whole service necessarily "dumb down" our worship? You know what I mean by "dumb-down?" Take away the sophistication, the solemnity, the quiet, (if not always rapt) attentiveness we all bring to worshipping.
And: Might there be a children's God? One that is cute and cuddly and gentle? — suggesting an alternative God for adults: a wise and wily and complex sovereign?
Interesting questions, worthy of our time and curiosity. While you think on those, I want to mention a most pleasurable mystery: children's drive to grow up. No 6-year old is completely happy being 6 because it is true to her that 8 year olds live in a more exciting world. Any 9-year old will tell you being part of something the grown-ups do has real thrills, (if someone will occasionally help him understand the parts that don't become clear right away.)
And also this exasperating mystery: The "why" sentences, such as: "Why do we walk up front for communion today?" Do you know what I mean?
In that driving and striving to learn more, be more, mature:
Let's praise God for the plan that makes maturity such a natural striving. We all love children, but a lifetime of childhood without becoming an adult is dangerous to one's survival! God's hope, I think, is that all who are adults get the pleasure of joining God's plan: helping the growing up happen.
It's necessary for children to learn about worship just as we do. There is no such thing as worship lite or children's worship. We are all children of God. As Susan Moseley said in an article she wrote in The Chimes, children who do not worship with us when they are children, do not worship at all, anywhere, when they are adults." That's a hard fact, (as researchers say).
An acquaintance of mine, John Witvliet(1), professor at Calvin Seminary, talks about what happens in congregations when children are full worship participants.
"Children need to participate in everything, not just special things made for them in which adults get to sit back and watch. This is for their sake and for ours. Children have gifts to give which everyone needs: gifts of faith, of questioning, of wonder; also gifts of loyalty, honesty and trust. Children are among life's best teachers of these qualities.
"Also, children need to stand, kneel, process, move, listen, speak, and — of course — sing! Holding still isn't good for children." That will be our challenge.
So, in what lies ahead, let's remember our Baptismal vows. All of us, remember that part in the Baptism, right before the water comes pouring down. It comes as a question: "Will we, the people of the church, promise to nurture, and support this child and his parents, and will we encourage her to become a faithful Christian?" God's people, with one voice say, every time, guaranteed: "We will!"
Carolyn Brown(2), a great Christian Educator and author, has some thoughts about worship and children:
- Stand the smallest children on the pew so their ears and eyes and mouths are near those other worshipers who are singing and praying and reading together.
- Hum or 'la-la' along with those can't read the words.
- Teach them first to sing repeated lines in the hymns
- Whisper instructions: "Now is the time we tell God things we're sorry about." Or "Listen to this story. It's a good one!"
- Whisper questions: "How do you think Jesus felt when Jairus came up to him?" "What does this story say about what happened to 'Becca next door who had to go to the hospital?"
- 5. Reflect, in comments, what something means to you. "After we sing the doxology think of what blessings you have." "My best blessing this week was our picnic!"
All this will come to us in time. And indeed, an exciting time it will be. I haven't been so excited about a new chapter in the life of a congregation I helped to lead in a very long time. I'm so pleased to be here, and to be part of the way worship will be. Time to go get ready. Only 10 weeks. Wow!
Amen and Amen.
NOTES
- John D. Witvliet, A Child Shall Lead: Children in Worship, c.1999 Choristers Guild
- Carolyn Brown, "Worship that is Friendly to Children — Part I" - www.calvin.edu/worship/planning/8_29_04.php
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